Mom Blaming Her Kids Being 'Clinically Obese' on Grandma's Cooking Slammed - Newsweek

A woman has been criticized online after she publicly blamed her kids being "clinically obese" on their grandma's cooking, in a viral Reddit post.

The mother wrote on June 26 with the username u/KatieSimmons_ that she'd moved herself and her three children back into her parents' house after losing her job and falling into financial difficulty a few years ago. It was while living at their grandparents' house that the children aged 5, 7 and 9, began to put on weight.

A child measuring their stomach with a tape. The Reddit user had voiced her concerns about her mother's cooking causing her children's recent weight gain, but was met with backlash and accusations of neglect by readers. Getty Images

"Everything was fine, but after a few weeks I noticed that the food being given to us was both unhealthy and given in very large quantities," the woman wrote.

"I didn't want to offend my mom so instead of bringing it up with her, I offered to do some of the cooking instead," she added. "However, she insisted that it all be done by her because she enjoys it."

"Then she started offering anything I didn't eat to the children who always ate all of it since they didn't realize how bad it was for them," the woman wrote. "I also didn't want to talk about this with the children because creating a fear about gaining weight always does more harm than good."

The woman added that the children's new eating habits went on for a whole year before she finally "brought it up" with their grandmother. The poster wrote that she also gained a significant amount of weight while living in her mom's home again.

"I've gained almost 50 pounds and am now almost obese and two of the children are clinically obese now," she added. "The youngest still being firmly overweight. All of them get a reasonable amount of exercise but it makes little difference when they're eating almost 3,000 calories a day.

"I told my mom she had to stop giving us so much unhealthy food but she snapped at me and said I should be grateful that she's even letting us stay there," she added.

Unsure as to whether she had been harsh to speak up to her mom, the woman called upon Reddit users to assess the situation and judge whether she'd acted out of turn.

The post has been commented on over 2,700 times. The majority of users took a stand against the woman for her actions.

One user wrote: "How can you neglect your kid to the point they are obese and blame it on your mom?! It was your responsibility to set boundaries. This is your fault, not your mom."

"You take no responsibility even for the food you put in your own mouth, but this neglect of your children is not on," another user added.

Expert Verdict: Move In With Someone Else if Nothing Changes

Amy Morin is a licensed clinical social worker and a multiple bestselling author, with her books specializing in mental health and resilience. Morin told Newsweek that the woman should've thought twice before criticizing her mother and blaming her for her children's collective weight gain.

"It's tough to ask someone to modify a gift that you're being given. Asking a family member to change their behavior might come across as ungrateful," Morin said.

"However, it's important to consider how not addressing the issue will affect the children, but asking the mother for help has led to her growing defensive. Instead, you could point out your observations about the children being overweight and ask if she would want to help you address the situation.

"It's unclear whether she lacks knowledge of how to eat healthier food or if she is unaware of portion sizes, but you'll need her on board if she's going to consider making any changes. Ultimately, it is her house, and she can do as she pleases. So, if she isn't interested in hearing the concerns, moving in with someone else may be the best option," Morin added.

If you have a family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.

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2023-06-29 15:49:02Z
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